I (28F) live with my housemate “Nikki” (29F). We generally keep everything separate in our shared house because it’s just easier that way. For example, my items go on the left side of shared spaces and hers go on the right, this was actually her idea. We also do the same with the fridge, cupboards, and basically everything else.
Our bedding is also stored separately because the linen cupboard is small and doesn’t have shelving. We each use labeled plastic storage containers to keep our things organized, again, Nikki’s idea.
Recently, I bought a new set of fuzzy winter bedsheets because it’s getting colder where we live (Southern Hemisphere, so winter has just started). I washed them and stored them away, planning to use them on Sunday.
When Sunday came, I couldn’t find them anywhere. After checking all the usual places, I asked Nikki if she’d seen them. She told me she had borrowed them because her room was cold.
I told her that wasn’t okay since she didn’t ask, and I needed them back so I could wash and use them. That’s when she casually mentioned that I probably wouldn’t want them anymore anyway because she had used them to have intercourse with her boyfriend.
I should also mention that I have contamination OCD (COCD), and Nikki is fully aware of this.
I completely snapped. I told her she owes me a new set of sheets because she knows I won’t be able to use those again. Even with washing, I’d struggle for hours trying to feel like they were “clean,” and realistically I still wouldn’t feel comfortable sleeping on them.
She told me I was being ridiculous, that I need to get over it, and either share properly or replace them myself.
I know I could just buy another set, but I feel like I shouldn’t have to. She didn’t ask before taking them, and honestly I feel like it’s incredibly disrespectful to use someone else’s bedding for that kind of thing, even setting my OCD aside. It also feels like she only mentioned it knowing I wouldn’t want them back.
Now she’s calling me crazy for expecting her to replace them, and I’m starting to wonder if I’m overreacting.
So, AITA?