AITA for walking out after my friend turned dinner into yet another “friendship test”?

Because honestly… I’m still trying to figure out if I reacted too strongly or if I just finally hit my limit.

So I (23F) have a close friend (24F) — let’s call her Stella — who has this really frustrating habit.

She doesn’t just talk about issues.

She tests people instead.

Like she’ll act distant to see if you notice, or wait for you to do something “nice” just to measure if you care enough. And afterward, she’ll proudly admit it was all a “test.”

It’s something I’ve told her before I’m not comfortable with. I’ve asked her multiple times to just communicate directly instead of turning friendships into hidden evaluations.

But last weekend… it happened again.

We went out for dinner with a couple of friends. Everything was normal — food, jokes, nothing unusual.

Until the bill came.

We asked for separate checks. I paid mine and didn’t think much of it, until I noticed something — I had been charged for one of Stella’s drinks.

She had already paid her bill, so I assumed it was just a mistake. I didn’t want to make a fuss in front of staff, so I decided I’d mention it later.

After dinner, as we were leaving, I casually told her about it. No tone, no drama — just a simple heads-up.

Her reaction?

Instant coldness.

She just said, “Oh.”

And went quiet.

I already felt the awkward shift, but I didn’t really know how to respond, so I let it go.

Later that night, she texted me saying she felt unappreciated in our friendship.

Apparently, she had noticed the drink issue at the table… but chose not to say anything because she wanted to see if I would just pay for it as a “thank-you” for helping me move months ago.

So basically… it wasn’t an accident to her. It was a test. Again.

At that point, I was genuinely annoyed.

I told her if she wanted appreciation, she should communicate it directly instead of expecting people to pass invisible friendship exams.

She replied that it “shouldn’t be her job to remind people to appreciate her.”

The next day, we agreed to meet for brunch to talk it out.

I got there first, ordered a coffee, and waited.

She arrived already in a serious mood and immediately started telling me I should reflect on my behavior.

And something in me just… switched off.

Because it felt like I was walking into another test I didn’t sign up for.

So I paid for my coffee, stood up, and left.

No shouting. No scene. Just me walking away.

Afterward, I texted her saying I’m done with friendship “tests” and that I can’t keep being part of something that doesn’t involve honest communication.

Now she’s saying I embarrassed her by leaving and that I was selfish for walking out.

And I keep going back and forth wondering…

AITA for leaving like that?

Or is it okay to walk away when every conversation feels like a test instead of a conversation?

What Do You Think?

At what point does wanting “appreciation” stop being healthy communication… and start turning into emotional testing that damages the friendship?

Because I genuinely don’t know if I overreacted… or if I just stopped participating in something that was never actually fair to begin with.

What would you have done in my place?